Tattoos ...

Nachdem Marino leider nicht mehr unter uns ist habe ich mich auf die Suche nach einem neuen Tätowierer gemacht und auch einen gefunden ...

Tattoo Nr. 5 folgt im Anschluss an meine Reise nach Mikronesien im Herbst.
Tattoo Nr. 6 (mein grösstes bisher) ist zum Zeichnen in Auftrag gegeben. In 4 bis 6 Wochen sollte ich den ersten Entwurf erhalten ... bin schon gespannt! Gestochen wird es zwischen Anfang und Mitte nächsten Jahres (bei der Grösse braucht es vermutlich mehrere Sitzungen).

Schiffsführerausweis

Hatte heute meine 7. Fahrstunde. So richtig im Griff hatte ich es allerdings dieses Mal nicht ... zu viele andere Boote auf dem See (und dadurch viele Wellen) und die Backbord- und Steuerbordlandungen sowie das Anlegen in einer Box gelang mir irgendwie nicht so wie ich es mir vorgestellt habe ... :-(

Aber das wunderschöne Foto kurz vor dem Sonnenuntergang
möchte ich Euch dann doch nicht vorenthalten.

Each day ...

Each day's a gift and not a given right ...
If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late ...
Every second counts 'cause there's no second try ...
So live like you're never living twice...

Haunted

I left

and was adamant
about not looking back
because remembering
is as painful
as leaving ...

But the mind
is a powerful thing
for it remembers.

And I find it funny
that something
seems to always
bring me
back to you -
a song, a book,
a movie, a quote,
a place, a food, the rain ...
even the littlest of things.

Worse,
the things I used to like
now I see and feel
with pangs
of loneliness
gnawing at me.

What's with this endless
torture,
this mockery
of my desire
to forget you?

Anything and everything
seems to remind me of you
and worst, even nothing
becomes you
for even in silence,
there still is
you ...

Stuck ...

"Move on."
my friends tell me
and I'd just smile -
a smile that just doesn't
reach my eyes
and I'd laugh
albeit hollowly
and in a voice ringing
with false conviction,
I'd even dare say,
"what for?
everything's so yesterday.
I am now over him."

But who am I fooling?

I'm stuck
in that place
where there's still an us
I'm helpless
so desperate that I refuse
to wake up
choosing to instead
be in a dream
than in an empty bed
with only my tears
for company.

It's not that
I don't want to move on
I do try
but something
seems to always
remind me of you -
little and big things
that the more I blot out,
the more they seem
to taunt me with their
presence.

Much like your omnipresence.

I'm stuck
and a way out
is nowhere to be found
for even my own mind
and heart betray me.

What's worse
than not moving on?

It's being stuck here
left alone to fend for myself
and still loving the jerk
who's responsible
for all this mess ...